Now I know how the Scarecrow felt!

Today, as I sit in our home back in Arundel, Maine on this gorgeous early New England fall day, we are back from our attempt at doing the Camino. My dream of doing this life-defining ancient pilgrimage was sparked by a casual reference in a book I read way back in 1983, continued unrealized for thirty years, was re-ignited after Joan & I both retired in 2010, became real during a year and a half’s training and last week ended suddenly after my body said “No mas!” in Estella, Spain. We had walked nearly a hundred miles, crossed the Pyrenees Mountains, spent nights in 12^th century monasteries now serving as hostels and had fallen in love with Spain, our fellow pilgrims and what we were doing.

So what’s the “scarecrow” stuff all about?  Well, it’s kind of the way I’m feeling right now as I try to sort out my emotions. Remember the scene in the wonderful movie “The Wizard of Oz” when Dorothy, Cowardly Lion, Tin Man and the Scarecrow are walking in the dark and scary woods (Signpost: “I’d go back if I were you!) and are attacked by the flying monkeys? The hay stuffing of Scarecrow is torn apart in the attack and as the others come to rescue him, he says: “There’s some of me over there and some of me over here!” 

That’s the way I feel.  I can look at our experience from two perspectives:

It was a failure.  Joan & I set out to walk 500 miles from St. Jean Pied a Port in France to Santiago de Compostela in Spain - the historic and fabled Camino Frances that has been walked by pilgrims for at least a thousand years. Nothing less than making it to Santiago counted. We trained for a year and a half, walked over 300 miles in preparation and climbed local mountains; we both lost lots of weight & got really fit at the gym. Yet I had to stop after only doing 20% of our mission. My body just gave out and I couldn’t even think of heading out into the sparsely populated miles ahead, so say nothing of the medical downside if I got worse. I wasn’t having “fun” anymore and Joan was getting really stressed by fear of the potential disaster looming ahead. So we just quit and headed home, not having done what we set out to do. We failed in our mission - as pre-conceived.

It was a success. We really did what any good explorer would do. We first did a “deep recon” of the landscape, people, obstacles and experiences that lay ahead to become better prepared to succeed in our objective, which was (and is) to be able to fully experience the transformational opportunities that present themselves in walking for a long time through an unfamiliar world. We came back from our two week reconnaissance mission with a much greater understanding of what we really need to do in order to reach our goal. We succeeded in our mission - as defined retrospectively.

Both of us are feeling more comfortable in the second “success” perspective now. We found out that:

• ·         We really need to speak some Spanish. Outside the big cities, we couldn’t communicate at all effectively. More importantly, we were only skimming the surface of the world we were in.  And once we moved off the well-worn “pilgrim track” (as we did when we sought medical help), it was dangerous to not be able to communicate. We start lessons on October 10^th.

• ·         Don’t believe the guide book. The ubiquitous Brierley Guide to the Camino was a trap for us. We fell into the mindset that doing 25 kilometers a day was normal and that we would be walking on lots of “gently rolling” terrain. We now understand that we will do best with daily stages of 10-12 km and that there will be lots of short, steep hills - up and down. We will do lots of hill training and climbing staircases with a 15 lb. pack, 10 times up and down.

• ·         Listen to your body. Accept the very real limitations that being a 79 year old (albeit pretty fit) walker entails. Stop early and often. Rest every 4-5 days and enjoy it, don’t feel guilty. Have our 15 pound backpacks carried by cab over the nasty parts. Take a bus every now and then. Do our own Camino that will fit us, not strive for some mythical “right” way to do it.

• ·         Cut it in small “chunks”.  The Europeans often tackle the journey in annual two to three week pieces, to fit with their vacation.  We should do the same, since the thought of being away from home for two months was a little disquieting and uncomfortable.

• ·         Hold on to home base. Our wonderful home in Maine is special to both of us and it doesn’t feel right to be away for so long. And when we get our new golden retriever pack-mate later this fall, shorter time-away will be even more important. .

I have just been checked out by my doctor (he also happens to be an experienced mountain climber who has been to Tibet and knows about the effects of sustained over-exertion) and he diagnosed me as basically OK – I was just worn out by continuing to burn more energy than I could rebuild; this resulted in my sudden loss of vitality and mental disorientation. He agreed that it was smart to stop when we did, which makes me feel better about deciding to quit in Legrono.

We are feeling revitalized and look forward to our Camino - Phase Two. Joan & I are planning to go back to Spain for three weeks in the fall of 2014.  We will fly to Madrid, and then start in Sarria, about 100 km from Santiago and “walk easy”, following the lessons we learned in our 2013 recon. We will only walk about 10 -12 km a day, with a few rest & exploration days thrown in at interesting places as well as spending time in Santiago. We then plan on taking a bus from Santiago to Finesterre at the western edge of Spain and spending at least a day there before returning to Santiago, heading back to Madrid and then flying home. That will mark a satisfactory completion of our pilgrimage together. But wait – there’s more!

Joan is already lining up some of her good friends for her own full 500 mile Camino in 2015. Ah, youth! Details and timing are in progress but when she’s on her own, my physical constraints on her fall away and she can plan her own experience. I may decide to volunteer for a couple of weeks as a hospitalero in an Camino albergue while she’s walking for two months or maybe I'll spend a week in Leon or Burgos sampling tapas and digging deeper into their history. Stay tuned. We also plan on being at the American Pilgrims on the Camino annual Gathering to be held near St. Louis in early April 2014. Join us!

Finally,as most of our readers know, we were walking for a great cause - the Merrimack Valley Hospice House. For those who have already contributed - thank you! If you're still waiting to make your charitable donation, there's no time like right now to get that 2013 tax deduction.